The downside of comparison

I’m always reevaluating my life goals and trying to determine if my goals make sense for me. Specifically, deciding how much is enough. How hard should I work and is the reward is something I actually desire – not what everyone else desires, what I personally desire. Are you easily influenced by others? I want to share the downside of comparison, and what I’m personally struggling with.

Sometimes we come to cross roads, or little pauses when we have to reevaluate what we’re doing, if it’s going great, bad, or slow, or overwhelmingly fast.

Being a blogger and in the influencer space has its struggles. Don’t get me wrong there are major perks and blogging is the ideal job for me – I did it before making a living doing it was a thing. I don’t struggle with jealousy when it comes to seeing people live their best life. I’m all for it, everyone deserves to do what they want to do, and live their best life. I hope we all get to do that!

What I struggle with is when I look around is wondering how busy I need to be professionally. It’s like – wait should I be doing that too? Posting that much, sharing, like is that what I should be creating, or charging, etc.

Blogging is still one of the most rewarding, and fulfilling jobs I’ve ever had. It pushes me to be my best self (not fake, I honestly don’t remember the last time I didn’t feel like I was not being authentic on any level other than when I had to post an old photo of me smiling when I was crying over the death of my dog). If anything, it allows me to rethink my thoughts, go deeper before I speak and share and also pushes me to document things I otherwise might forget about. I am deeply appreciative for what this job brings for me personally as it has stretched me, allowing me to grow and be my best self. It also encompasses everything I love to do – be social (introvert/extrovert), photography, writing, graphic design, web design, and marketing. It’s my creativeness and past career experiences all in one job.

I’m at a place right now looking at two paths – like an airport terminal, I can either walk at my own place to my gate, or I can take the moving sidewalk and get there faster, but maybe it has a usage fee, and maybe at the gate I’m headed to won’t have enough seats because the other flight hasn’t taken off so getting there early is a gamble. Is going the faster route worth the cost, will the reward be there will I find an empty seat? It’s like the Chicago airport a place where there is never enough seats at the gate! Or what if the plane takes off early and I don’t even get a seat on the plane! Is there a guarantee?

Did that sound like I was talking in code or what? I’m not purposefully trying to be vague. I’m wondering which basket to put my eggs (like money eggs) and energy into.

I laid in bed and just thought about for what seemed hours – debating whether I should be investing in one area of my business that requires a lot of work and money – nothing I’m afraid of doing by any means, or am I OK with where I am?

There will always someone else to catch up to. But do I want to be in that space, that busy, or was the main purpose of what I am (being a self-employed entrepreneur) already enough – am I content and happy living the life I have? And then I remember this post, how I define success. My goals are different than others. I’m making a comfortable living while maintaining flexibility to maintain happiness. I enjoy my comfortable life without so many pressures.

Have you ever come to that place where perhaps you wonder if you pull back, or accelerate if it’s really what you want in the long run? Just a thought.

Sometimes we see what others are doing and create an expectation for ourselves – as though we have to be doing the same, working for ourself, securing big deals, doing all the same things everyone else creating a constant mentality of having to catch up.

I mean this though process can go beyond business my friends, this can be about education, marriage, children, travels, savings, retirement, everything that we’re all participating in at different times and experiencing it all in beautiful different ways.

The repercussions of comparison can be confusion. However I also recall when a girlfriend of mine told me she moved careers, got a raise and it motivated me to pursue a new career and seek higher pay too! Sometimes others can motivate you positively.

And so here I am – back to realizing what your goals are personally, and what means will it take to get there? Money? Time? Knowing if it’s worth the trade will help decide if the goal is worth it. For me, while I know my goals, I also wonder if I can cut back on Netflix couch time. Perhaps I actually find value in my mid-afternoon naps, lazy couch days. Maybe my current balance of life and work I’m currently living is not worth taking the moving sidewalk. Only time will tell. ♥

Hair and makeup by Lizzy Marsh, Photography by Autumn Renae.