This is not home


Over the weekend, in the midst of my anger, I prayed to have a heart attack and immediately die. I know that’s not funny one bit, and I’m not laughing about it or making a joke out of it. I really did though, I was so freaking mad over everything that had happened over the past 24 hours and now, there I was trying to put a freshly washed Pottery Barn slipcover back on my couch only to find it shrunk 2 inches on all sides and wouldn’t fit properly.

I had just come back from evening church service and it was a continued sermon on Relevations – everyone’s favorite right? There was a photo of ISIS on the big screen from an event when they martyred Christians a few years ago on the beach. Those killed wouldn’t deny or shame Christ and lost their lives that day, a true example of staying strong in the faith.  I decided heaven and being with Jesus was much more appealing than the crap I was going through here on Earth – including shrunken couch slipcovers – in heaven slipcovers probably don’t shrink.

It shouldn’t be the bad stuff that happens here makes me really yearn to be in heaven. It should be daily that I focus on heaven as my home.

My brand new iMac had just crashed for the fourth or fifth time this year, to the point where I wipe the drive and reinstall Time Machine. Our microwave/oven combo stopped working from me hitting a “cancel” button. Our sprinklers aren’t working and we just seeded the winter rye, and once I got the computer OS installed I found that all my programs were incompatible costing me $400 to repurchase the programs. It didn’t stop there but those issues aren’t the point of the post.

I know those problems are stupid. In fact, I really kept cool through it all, in front of other people, even on the customer service line for 1.5 hours.

But that couch slipcover, man that did it. I was by myself in the living room when I decided to just wig the heck out – I had enough. It might sound dumb and you’re probably thinking, gosh all of these Earthly dumb problems makes you want to die? These annoyances aren’t worth dying over at all. But it made me realize something, it shouldn’t be the bad stuff that happens here makes me really yearn to be in heaven. It should be daily that I focus on heaven as my home – in good times and in bad.

Sometimes I put too much emphasis here – here being Earth, my daily life. The things I love and enjoy, traveling, house, the simple pleasures – I think there’s no way I want life to end, ever. That mentality is dangerous and is not allowing me to focus on eternity. I try to balance being grateful for the big and simple pleasures in life without grasping too tightly, and hoping to keep my focus where it needs to be – without the need for a shrunken slipcover to remind me that the couch in the house I’m living in, really isn’t home.

“Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth.” Col 3:2.


Miss American Pie

apple-hill-web-2Vneck: J.Crew (on sale) / Jeans: Blank Denim / Sunnies: Wildfox

I had a great week back home – I hardly had much time to sleep in, but I did sneak in some relaxation watching Netflix of course but every day we did something. My parents are so active while retired I can barely keep up! From an outdoor home show to an eggplant festival, there was always something to check out around here. I didn’t realize there was so much to do back home!

One of the days we headed up to Apple Hill, a place that is a childhood memory for every Nor Cal kid. There are over 50 farms/ranches in the area, Christmas trees, pumpkins and apple trees. You pretty much stop at a location, order apple pie, juice, donuts, cookies, sauce, anything and everything that apples can be made of! It’s so fun and the atmosphere is magical – it makes you excited that it’s fall!


The season starts in September and Apple Hill is open through December, I think even to the end (I wanted to link but the site isn’t working)! We stopped at a few favorite spots, enjoyed a slice of apple and rhubarb pie, sitting beneath apple trees.

Dad couldn’t wait for me to take a pic and already took a bite. I don’t blame him.


My parents are the best Instagram parents and they totally get into it which is so sweet. I was taking photos with my mom and turned around to see my dad sitting at the picnic table enjoying the weather after his pie and thought it was so cute.


I saw a lot of friends while I was back home, they kept me equally busy as my parents and though I love photography, sometimes just being camera free and being present in the moment is so nice. There’s something about having friends who have known you before you hit puberty and have known your parents for the longest time. Isn’t it nice when old friends feel like home?

Speaking of homes, spotted this adorable one that I had to snap a photo.


I realized how many “Old” towns/city parts there are. I guess I’ve been used to it, but I forget how much history has been here with the gold mines and such. It was such a nice relaxing trip home, and it rained and hailed the last day, which to me, is perfection. I swear I could live in Seattle – says the girl who lives in the over abundance state of sunshine.

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